New, Improved Philosophy of History: “I Inherited A Mess,” And Good Luck Holding Me Accountable For Anything

Renowned philosopher of history Donald J. Trump enunciated his cardinal principle today in a press conference with the King of Jordan.  “The world is a mess; I inherited a mess.”  This all-purpose hermeneutical key to interpreting Mr. Trump’s non-accountability for all subsequent events was delivered with a straight face.  Yet one cannot help wonder why the man bothers to continue waking up in the morning and being president for yet another day.  If all his predecessors made such a hash, missed so many opportunities, and in general FAILED, and Mr. Trump consequently cannot possibly be responsible for today’s disasters, what exactly is his job description?  Breaking Update: Trump: “I do change. I am flexible… I now have responsibility…it is now my responsibility.”  How about that.  We should probably get ready for the Obliviate Memory Charm.  P.S.  Obama did also say “I inherited a mess,” but those who can recall the financial crisis of 2008 know that he did in fact inherit a big mess.

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